Saturday, May 25, 2013

School is out PARTY!

 The Dowding yearly schools out party! Some of the traditions we have had as a family had to change due to circumstances. I am doing my best to keep as many of them as possible. The schools out party is one of our favorites. Although we had to make a few changes this year, we still made sure to party like crazy:) In the past we have done invitations, inviting friends from the boys classmates. This year we kept it small, inviting a few close friends and neighbors. Every year we do some sort of water activity; water slides, water balloons, sprinklers or etc. Since the weather was cool, it was ok that we where not doing those this year.
Our parties always include some food. This year Emery grilled us hot dogs. I made this yummy fritos and corn salad. I added green onions as well. Similar recipe here:   http://www.food.com/recipe/frito-corn-salad-88251?layout=desktop  

We also had macaroni salad, Kool-Aid, bomb pops, chips, cottage cheese, baked beans. We cooked outside and enjoyed eating outside.
I went to the dollar store earlier and got stuff for fun! I got side walk chalk, bubbles; and stuff for our 3 fun, messy events. We did baking soda and vinegar; mentos and diet coke; and of course our yearly shaving cream fight. Our driveway and yard where a mess but everyone had a blast. The only mess left at the end was a yard full of shaving cream, thankfully  the rain  washed it all away for us.
 I was a little afraid that we might cause a car accident with all the people driving by  and looking at the yard full of kids making a mess. All together we had 9 boys and 1 girl here:) The night ended with the kids all showered and cleaned up and watching a movie while the moms enjoyed some time out on the porch visiting and encouraging one another.
 I love summer and having my kids to myself. Well other then when they head off for the many camps they attend. No homework, is a plus as well. Although I still have that homeschool mother in me, the kids do a math worksheet, some reading, and writing almost daily in the summer. We headed the day after school got out and signed up for the summer reading program. I try to keep our summers fun and busy. We look forward to time at the pool, library, parks, friends, and anything else we can come up with to do. Knowing this is Daltons last summer before graduation makes me want to make it extra special for him and the fact that last year I had my broken leg and our "getting out and going" was a bit limited.







Wednesday, May 22, 2013

 Jody (and many others) have nick named Dalton, Superman. Im not sure if it because he always wears superman shirts or because he talks about him often. Jody found Dalton a superman shirt. Dalton decided it would be fun to get Jody a superman (woman) shirt. It is still difficult to get these two to take a "Nice" picture. Although, it is a lot of fun trying. Dalton asked if we could have the high school group from church over some Sunday evening. Since I had Saturday off this week and the boys where at camp, I decided this would be a good weekend. I was a little nervous that my house and yard would be to small and unsure what the group would do to entertain themselves. Well have no fear. A busy street and a group of kids.....plenty to do. Groups of kids stood or sat by the street and had many cars honking at them. It was pretty funny. We also had a game of "ninja" going on in the driveway. The group brought their own dinners but I provided dessert. It was a fun evening and I am very impressed with this group of kids. I will make sure to host this group again sometime.



 Brownell, along with some other schools, had a family zoo night. We decided to make it a family fun night. We had a picnic to start off the evening. I was looking forward to not cooking, so we grabbed subway. Not to mention a few of the boys had gotten subway gift cards for Easter and they where excited to use them. We then headed off for the zoo. I thought maybe the boys would feel a little old for the zoo, but surprisingly they all had a great time.


 Feeding the goats was great entertainment. I think we could have stayed there for an hour. Oh wait maybe we did. It did make the little boys sad that the big goats kept hogging all the food. So they stepped up to feed the little ones.
 I love this picture. They where all together and all talking. May there be many more moments like this for the rest of their lives.
 Carter was most captivated by the insects. We are going to have to go back during a less busy time; allowing Carter time to just sit and check out the bugs. I plan to go grab him some library books on bugs when we sign up for the summer reading program on Friday. This is one of my favorite summer activites and we have taken part in it since Dalton was about 2.
We then headed to the park. It has been a long time since we have been to this park. Not sure who the other kid is in this picture, but he was instant friends with the boys. We then met up with some friends at the ice cream place by pioneers park. What an amazing evening. I sure had a happy and thankful heart.

Saturday, May 18, 2013

Broken for a reason

A year ago today, I fell and broke my leg. You might be thingking, why write about this when it happened a year ago? Well, I feel like it was a big changing point in my life. So on May 18, 2012, John called and asked if I would like to take the boys to Kansas City with him for the weekend. Deciding to think about it for a while, I told him I would call him back. Sad to say, but I don't really remember praying about the decision. At first I decided no way. We had been seperated for a month. We had rarely talked or had any interactions with each other. Then I began to think: what if I am unable to take the boys to one of their favorite spots for a long time? What if I wont ever be able to afford this again? At this point I did not know of Johns affair and I really was wanting to repair our marriage. I wanted our family together. So i also thought maybe this weekend could be a start in putting the pieces back together. Deciding to go, I packed us a picnic dinner and  packed the kids clothes. We decided to make it a secret and not tell the boys. John decided to leave his phone at home and use this time to focus on our family. (Should have sent warning flags since he is attached to that phone).


 We set off, many of my friends and family had a bad feeling about this but had decided to keep their opinions to a minimum. We found a nice place in Nebraska City for a picnic. After eating, I decided to take the kids over to this Lewis and Clark area. ( I can not really tell you what it was since I never made it over there). We took off walking and I fell down into a ditch. I looked down at my foot that was no longer facing forward and I knew this was not good. I screamed for John, who came running over. He quickly asked for my phone. It was in my pocket and I was unable to move. Bronson thinking quickly, pulled out his phone and dialed 911. Man it seemed to take forever. At one point I began to think I might pass out and it made me nervous, then I thought well if I would pass out this would not hurt so bad. I never passed out and the ambulance and a bunch of volenteer fire fighters showed up. They where giving me shots before even attempting to move me. They took me to the hospital where they gave me something that totally put me out. While out they put my leg back in socket and stabalized it. They decided I would need to go to Lincoln for surgery. The ambulance would take me. All I really remember is waking up and asking for more of the medicine they gave me. John states that they did and that I stopped breathing and turned blue. They gave me oxygen and refused me that med next time I asked for it. (Those of you that know me know I hate meds and rarely ask for any)

 We made it to Lincoln sometime in the middle of the night. I was scheduled for surgery first thing the next morning. I was pretty nervous because this was a first for me. Knowing I was going to be down for 12 weeks and that it was 1 week from the kids summer break, made me pretty bummed. God showed me some amazing things that summer. He showed me just how much people cared for my family. Providing meals, movies, snacks , cards, prayers, visits, and phone calls. I was amazed. John and I where spending time together through this. He would give me rides to the kids events and help out with the kids more.


 My grandpa loaned me a moterized wheel chair, it worked great for taking the kids on the bike trail, we went to movies, libraries, stores,swimming pools, friends houses,  even out to eat. God was so great in providing this, it was a joy to still spend time out and about with the boys.


 I kept wondering why did this happen. Some had stated- to keep me away from John. I was leaning more to let me see he still cared- since he never left the hospital the entire time I was there. God knew that I was not really ready for the truth. I didn't know that during this time, John was still with the other woman. Here I thought we where working on putting our family back together, but was being decieved the entire time. I really feel God knew, that at the time, I was not ready to know the truth. He allowed the pain of this broken leg, knowing it would hurt worse then the pain that could have happened , had we made it to Kansas City and began repairing a marriage built on a lie.



 The boys and I stayed at my parents house this summer, until I was able to care for the boys and myself at home.


This is my foot today, These scars will always be a reminder to me that God has the boys and I right where He wants us. That my plans are not always His plans but, that He knows better. That God protects me and will use whatever means He knows is best. I will be thankful for that time in my life and for God only allowing me to see what He knew I could handle, because, as I look back i think...... WHAT WAS I THINKING? :)

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Blessed beyond measure

 Brotherly love: The boys are loving our new neighborhood. They have some great neighbors here. One of our neighbors has two small, older dogs. She lets us take these dogs for walks whenever we want. This has greatly helped the boys who miss our dog Walter so much. The dogs love the boys and get so excited to see us. They even come over to the house, like they are asking where are the boys? Thank you Lord for the blessing of great neighbors. We have already made some bonds here with these people and I realize God hand picked these neighbors just for us. 

 So the other day we where enjoying playing around the neighborhood, when I realized boys sure do play different then girls. haha. while I grew up lining up my "babies" on the couch, (airplane) and toting around dolls and diaper bags, boys are rough and tough. Yup this was the scene on the street that day. Should I be concerned? kinda looks like Bronson had the upper hand hugh?
 FYI : the unmowed grass is not our yard lol. Love the life of a mom of boys.

Monday was a nice day, I got done at work before the kids got out of school so I packed us a lunch and picked up the boys. We headed to the library and then off to the park. It was so nice. I spent some time calling each boy over to just sit and chat with me. Beings there is 5 of them and 1 of me, the one on one time can sometime be hard to find. I loved these few minutes with each one. We talked of the struggles they where facing and I even made them discuss FEELING! another thing I find so different between boys and girls. Yup they don't want to talk about it. But I found it was helpful for them to express some things that they are dealing with. This may have to be a new event for us.
 Dalton and I took a date night this week, we went to the new iron man movie. I was so impressed with my date. He opened doors for me and was very kind. We had a great time. Yup that's a date I will never turn down. I think its great practice for teaching boys how to treat a woman on a real date. Another event we may need to make a habit. Wow that's 5 dates for me. That will keep me busy and 1 happy lady:)
 Mothers day 2013: actually this is the night before mothers day. We have had a rough few days. I ended up taking Emery to the er as Friday night he was having a lot of trouble breathing, feeling very week, felt like his throat was closing up and had a very strange cough going on. We ended up being there until 5 am (mind you I had been up since 5 am the day before and I had to be to work at 6 am) They put Emery on an inhaler and where not real sure what was causing all this. His oxygen was low and his lungs sounded restricted. We went home where I caught a little nap and then went to work. When Emery woke up his complaints where pretty much the same. I decided to take him back to dr. Our doctors office has Sat. appointments available so we went there. Again the dr. noticed the issues but not sure what would cause this all the sudden.
 I brought Emery home. Some of the boys where with Their dad and when he brought them home Emery was sad he had no way (no energy) to go to the store to get food for my surprise mothers day meal. The little boys decided they would see if their dad would take them to the store. He agreed to. So armed with Emerys list and cash, my little ones headed off to do some grocery shopping. The boys had me relax on the couch with a book while they went to cooking. I was so happy to see them all working together. Poor Emery was trying his best to do it, (hes my little chef) but he got all the boys happily helping. They even planned waiters for me. (how cute is that?) we had pizza, French fries, pomagranates, and ice cream sandwiches. Emery told me he had planned to grill me something but decided with the way he was feeling he wanted something easier to make. We even had sparkling apple cider. It was wonderful.. How blessed am I?
 
 

The boys did all that the night before mothers day. With church on Sunday they wanted to have a little more time for it. Oh did I mention they even had candle light? Mothers day night was pretty sleepless again, Emery was still not feeling well. It was hard for me to sleep, constantly checking on him. I had planned on taking the kids for a picnic to pioneers park today for mothers day but I believe we will be spending a more relaxing day at home. Im ok with that.
This is the book I'm reading now.  It's very good and I'm working on spending a lot more time praying for my kids. Being a kid is hard, being a kid facing everything we have been through....well that's a lot for anyone. I realize that there is so much I want for my kids. A life filled with God. I want them to be saved by the grace of God, to be free of sexual sins, to be free of any drug or alcohol or any other addictions, to have God centered marriages and homes, to not lie, to ...... well you get the picture the list goes on and on. Its overwhelming. I realize the greatest was to help me in raising these kids, is to rely on the help of their heavenly father. He will never leave us or forsake us. This is a truth the kids kind of struggle with. I try to regularly remind them that no matter what, God is always there for us. I'm trying to come up with a new prayer journal just for my prayers for the boys. But so far I still just write them in my normal prayer journal.

Monday, May 6, 2013

More reasons to forgive...

Forgiveness.... yup more on this topic. can you tell I have been studying it a lot? well here is the newest reasons to forgive.
Here is some of the devastating effects of unforgiveness:
-when we refuse to forgive, we are disobedient to Gods word
-we open a door for satan to start all kinds of trouble in our life
-we hinder the flow of love towards others
-our faith is blocked and our prayers are hindered
-we are miserable and lose our joy
-are attitudes are poisoned and we spew the poison onto everyone we meet




1Peter 3:9-12
Not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a BLESSING instead; for you where called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing. For the one who desires life, to love and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and do good. he must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous and his ears attend to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.

Ok here we go: Not returning evil for evil or insult for insult but giving a BLESSING instead. (capitals are mine not in real text)
This is hitting me today; I can not just pray for John and this woman, for their salvation. (which actually has a hidden meaning for myself, if they where to get saved they would realize the sin and see this act for what it really is) But I need to also play they would be blessed. UGH, This may not be an easy one but I feel like it is the next step. If God says it then there is a reason. Its what He calls me to do. I will not dwell on why I don't want to or how hard it is for me but will realize I must do it and do it with a happy heart.

An issue came up today where I was put on the spot with John, I could have been very angry and bitter towards him for how his actions are affecting the boys. I instead have decided to work through the issues with the boys. Use my energy to train up the boys and not to try to get John to feel guilty for how his actions have hurt our children. Oh how my heart hurts for my kids. Lord please guard the hearts and minds of these amazing children. Mine as well as the other children out there facing the same events in life.


Thursday, May 2, 2013

"pick me"

Im so loving the neighbor kids. We have a great family 2 doors down whom happens to be great friends with Megan (Daltons buddy from church)  They are the sweetest and the boys are looking forward to much more outside play time when the weather warms up.
Bronson was seen carrying this around and stated "This is how I will ask a girl to marry me, I will open this box and say pick me!" I loved it, I sure hope we remember to make sure he does do this. I realized the other day that I am raising 5 guys to be someone's husband. Im training them for another woman. Although I hate that saying, it puts in perspective some things we must work on. Im going to have the boys start praying for me. Also for their future wife as I want it to be a habbit to always pray for her. We will work harder on them opening the doors for me and other ladies and on showing kindness. I have also decided to have them help more with the budget, thus training them for this. Man sometimes mothering seems so overwhelming. I pray that God will use what I teach them and then fill in the gaps?????? Yes I have started praying for the boys way more then ever.
 This goes with my post from the other day but I just love it. Im still working very hard on forgiveness. I still seem to have mean and angry thoughts pop into my head but I am really working at stopping them when they occur. I have been praying for the very people that I am angry towards. It is helping and I must say refreshing to not let me sit and dwell on the thoughts that just cause bitterness. I even find myself stopping when tempted to think and say unkind words. Again Im sure no one would blame me for the things I want to say and think but I am not using this world as my ruler to measure up against. I want to handle this above and beyond. I sometimes wonder why God wanted the boys and I to face this. I know of many others that would be so much better exmaples as they face this. But I love the saying "God trusted us with this pain now what are we going to do with it" He trusted me with finding out the truth, He trusted me with the pain and emotions that come with finding out your husband had an affair. He not only trusted me but this is part of His plan for our family and I trust Him that good will come of it and glory for Him. May I be able to have my kids look at me and be proud of the example I showed them through this trial.

My bible study tools (pink of course) I found these notecards at walgreens. The bottom of the pages are color coded. I have a section for forgiveness, one for anxiety, one for joy, one for verses that pertain to parenting and there is still a section or two undecided yet. I write verses that I want to memorize or just keep close. The pen is also a highlighter and has those fun little tabs to stick on the edge of the paper. Then I have taken sticky notes and added notes in my room. Things like JOY:Jesus, others you. If I am unhappy its my own fault because I can choose not to be. Are my words kind, truthful, necessary. I plan to put them more around the house also as I have spotted more then one child reading them on my wall. Yes some of this is so simple and should be normal, but Im working harder on keeping Christ the center of our home.

Some things on unforgiveness Ive learned: unforgiveness always keeps score, it boast of its good behavior, it complains, it divides, seperates, brings up the offense, resents the blessings of the offender.
Oh may I not lean towards an unforgiving heart but rest in Gods forgiving spirit.